The Magnetic Push and Pull
by Just Lovely
Summary: AU. Whether you want to believe it or not, there's the bluntness of the situation. Whether you forgive or not, you'll live with the choice all your life. You'll push but he'll pull.  Birthday!fic for IHAVEGotSOULButIAmNoSoldier.


**Disclaimer:** not mine

_Dedication:_ to Soul (IHAVEGotSOULButIAmNoSoldier),happy belated birthday! And hope you had a great one!

Prompts: silver necklaces / motorcycles / long gowns / sparkling jewelry

_The Magnetic Push and Pull_

**By: _Just Lovely._**

As she grew up, her world was no longer mixed with Outside. Rather, her life became confined, the walls grew closer and her form grew smaller – everything seemed to close up around her. And like the curious but cautious Vampire she was, she went towards the lit door that looked like an exit, not sure of what she'd find there.

...-...

The sun glowed bright yellow and it burned her eyes, her skin, her mind, but she kept watching it anyways. She stood in her bedroom, white satin curtains, plush velvet cushions and it was all too _extravagant_. Too much of wealth and not enough of the freedom that she craved every single moment of her life. It was all regulations and strict orders, proper for a noble family princess; but no matter her status or her rank, she simply didn't want that. And all she longed for was a breath from the Outside world, the life and _freedom_ that stood behind the high, strong walls of the palace.

She didn't like restraints and this certainly was a strong one.

...-...

His whole life revolved around them; about destroying Level-Es and maintaining a peaceful balance between Hunters, Vampires and Humans – though the latter was often unknown to the happenings that occurred around them. He was armed, ready, quick and held a murderous aura about himself but, it was rarely shared amongst his rank. He was monotone and emotionless – even to the point of scary – and all his fellow Hunters thought it was because of his profession, the occupation that he was born and raised to do.

They didn't know the truth. Because there wasn't just one response, not just one answer to every question, there was no right or wrong but there was a logical explanation. It concerned her highness, formerly known as Cross Yuuki, presently known as the princess of the Kuran family. And a motive for his goal; to get away from Hunters, from Vampires and anything else that had to do with her.

...-...

There were too many preparations.

Everyone was hurrying through a time in which was used for slumber; maids were arranging and rearranging, servants carried big plant pots, platters, golden goblets and fine porcelain china to and fro. She watched with an unmoving gaze, eyes bright and a piercing scowl on pale features.

It wasn't worth it. No, this event – a gathering of sorts – was beyond ridiculous; it was a mere show of status and the money that came with it. She may have been of the noble rank then, but never would she have held a party to show off in such an egoistic manner. She may have been a Vampire; but she was still Cross Yuuki, the girl who used to guard the Night dormitory and watch over the Day students. She was still _her_.

But the aching that never went away, that tormented her un-beating heart spoke so much more – and that was because it represented the thing she left behind. Her humanity, the life she had grew up with; Chairman Cross – former Hunter –, Yori-chan...and Zero.

She clutched the smooth white satin above the left side of her chest, willing the throb to cease and disappear; because it hurt both mentally and physically. It was then, at that moment that she wished time would wind back, back to her human days where she talked to Zero, where they watched the moon on night duty; where everything was a little more _normal_.

The bitter ache of fantasy never turning into reality hit her too soon. There was a metallic sting in her mouth as she realized how sharp her canines were, they pierced her tongue and she watched with distaste as it slowly mended itself back together.

She couldn't quite feel the pain, but at least Yuuki could still feel the sweet hurt of humanity.

...-...

Humans.

That's what Zero imagined them to be – it was a forced trigger as his hand reflexively grasped the handle of his pistol that stuck plainly in view. He was a Hunter and this was a social gathering of aged Vampires, he couldn't just _kill_ them, but it didn't stop him from forming his lips into a disgusted sneer and for his eyes to narrow in revulsion.

They flowed past him, dressed in satin and velvet, heads held up high in a clear gesture of superiority. And they made him sick.

His finger clicked off the safety as the metal gun hung limply in his hand. His arm raised, his expression serious and almost excited at the anticipation of lodging a bullet into the cold flesh of a Vampire.

A strong calloused hand clapped him on the shoulder as a hand was placed firmly on his gun, lowering the threatening weapon. Around the two men, no one casted them a single glance.

"You're here to keep peace not break it." the man drawled, his posture tense.

"Is that what I'm doing, because it doesn't seem like they're keeping their end of the bargain." Zero hissed back, yanking himself away from the man in front of him.

There was truth in his words, the man knew as his eyes swept above the high ceilinged room. There were humans at this gathering. Stupid, oblivious humans.

"They came here willingly," the man responded quietly, wary.

"Like hell they did, Kaito, you and I both know that isn't true. They didn't even know anything, they're going to-"

"It's not our **place**, Zero." the Hunter, Kaito, said harshly; steely eyes glaring down at the white haired man – who was a mere boy who couldn't listen to orders and follow protocol. Insolent and thick-headed, rebellious, really.

"Don't give me that bull shit."

There was a lit fire of anger and spite, uncontrollable and wild in him. Zero turned and stalked away, his mess of white hair hazy in the crowd of non-breathing Vampires who held tall glasses of a scarlet liquid too thick to be wine; the humans hung on their every word, mesmerized.

...-...

Breath in and out, in and out. It was a forced human habit that struck, Yuuki knew, as she gazed at the mirror reflection. She couldn't see herself – her _human_ self – in the features of the girl who stared back at her with a bright intoxicating beauty.

The reflection, she held herself in a tight elegant poise, a breathtaking charming smile on rose lips, scarlet – instead of her warm brown – eyes cold, heartless. Her skin was flawless, white starch and her brown hair was clipped back from her face, long curls tumbled down her back. She was too exquisite, ethereal, _unreal_.

Silver beads hung from her swan neck, tight as they pressed against her throat; it was too pretty, too elegant for someone like her. Her gown was long, traditional as all the other long gowns that touched the waxed floor, pooling in velvet and satin.

The mirror was lying, Yuuki told herself reassuringly, because she couldn't be the dazzling creature that stared back at her, it wasn't true – it couldn't be true. Her body told her to strip off the things because they weren't hers, because they weren't _her_. While her heart, the non-blood-pumping organ, told her to stay because this was her party, for her new welcome of regaining her memories, of becoming a Vampire again – for returning.

And no matter how much she wanted to breath fresh air again and escape the dingy, classy, suffocating collapse of the walls; she couldn't. She took a deep breath – a habit – and exited the door, mustering courage as she descended the spiral staircase and everyone's attention was on her. Kuran Yuuki, Pureblood princess.

...-...

He could feel the air shift as bodies moved to face the staircase where she stood in a bright breath of glowing happiness. He could smell her lavender shampoo, her ivory soaped skin and the thick sweet scent of her perfume. The same perfume he had grown accustomed to, the very one that was so intoxicating and mesmerizing.

Somewhere in the crowd of onlookers and humble Vampires, her red eyes found his with a leap of surprise and joy, he didn't return her smile. His eyes hardened and from her crestfallen expression, Zero could see perfectly well the hurt that he inflicted upon her. He turned around and strode out through the doors, a tenseness set in his shoulders and a conscious that screamed at him because what he was doing, it affected both ends; him and her. And they were hurting whether he chose to feel it or not.

...-...

It hurt, a lot, too much but not enough. And she guessed she deserved it, she had been the one to turn her back on him in favour of her dear brother, Kaname, she was the one who put everything on the line and lost. She guessed she deserved it.

So she ignored the swelling pain and pushed away her need and utter want to escape to freedom. She pasted the calm, shy smile onto her face and rolled her shoulders back, pretending to enjoy her party.

It was a few minutes later that she noticed the beating pulses of humans that made her mouth pool, the stench almost nauseating if not welcomed. It was moments after that, that she noticed that almost every Hunter was watching her. A hand ready at their exposed belts, ready to _kill_ if the need arose.

She felt sick, along with that she felt...she didn't particularly know anymore. The happiness of her link to Kaname, the anxiousness of tasting blood, the raw pain when she realized just how much she had let fall between her fingers. The shock, the sadness, the acceptance and understanding. She was a dangerous caution and Yuuki could see the mild amusement reflected in every Vampire's eyes – they were waiting for her to snap, to pounce and let the blood feast begin.

She stumbled out the door, her curls tangled and messy, her gown wrinkled and stained with anxious perspiration, her sparkling jewelry not sparkling anymore.

Yuuki hit a stiff board, broad and thick with muscle. Somewhere in that encounter, her foot slipped and a surprised look flashed on her pale visage as she closed her eyes and awaited the instant pain that would follow.

But instead, she felt his arm wind around her waist and bring her back to balance, his face was stony with obligation, tight.

"Thank you." she murmured quietly into the stiff air, fighting the urge to throw her arms around him.

He didn't nod at her like he used to, instead, turning on a heel, he walked back towards the doors. But, Yuuki wasn't going to let everything fall apart again, she was going to fix it – one way or another – whether he let her or not.

"Zero?" her voice was soft, barely above a whisper and it made him freeze in his step. He didn't turn around to look at her, letting her eyes sink into the snow whiteness of his head; but her next words...they were apologetic and so _influential_.

"I'm sorry."

Words. They were merely words, weren't they? So why did he feel so angry, so hurt and damaged all at the same time? Why did he feel like he wasn't the only one hurt in the conflict?

"You know," she continued, making no move towards him – he was glad at that. "I never actually thought it would have happened like that. I didn't think I'd lose all those things, Yori-chan, you, being a student. And I miss all those things, I was wrong to think that everything would be perfectly fine after. I was wrong." she repeated, a bitter chuckle escaping her and it was filled with an immense explosion of regret.

It didn't suit her, it didn't suit the Yuuki now or before, and, it never suited someone like her, he thought. Too nice, too innocent, too oblivious to the world around her. She didn't know what was bothering him now or before, she didn't know that most of the humans – if not all – were going to be drained that night, she didn't know the power-hungry thoughts that ran through the minds of the Purebloods, she didn't know that every single Hunter that night was waiting for her to snap. She didn't _know_.

And that one fact alone, made him see Yuuki. Because he knew her even if she didn't know every nook and cranny in him – he knew hers. Her drive, her motive, her goal for her freedom and even then, as he turned his body and looked at the face full of fierce determination, he could still see her need for it. But he wouldn't let himself be swayed by her pretty words and their fond memories. He wasn't going to make the mistake he did with Shizuka – the woman who killed everyone dear to him.

"You've apologized, but where does that move you now? A level up? A chance to make everything right?" Zero snarled, disgust, hatred in his voice; and he couldn't stop himself. He couldn't stop the words of all the pain he had endured from flowing out.

She wanted to cry. Yuuki wanted to let the sting of tears fall and splatter onto the cobblestone floors. It hurt as she let a shuddering breath escape her form.

"A chance for _forgiveness_," she responded, a choked reply.

And she sounded so broken, so shattered and hurt and, he didn't know what to say. For a moment, he stood there, thinking, thinking, thinking. Words forming in his mind and slipping out through his lips, one by one.

"You don't know anything about forgiveness."

She stared back at him for a minute, her glassy eyes dry, her painted lips pursed and her small little fists trembling with emotion – rage, sadness, pain.

"I don't know anything about forgiveness? Me? Are you _stupid_?" her tone was icy, cruel and incredulous. The Yuuki he knew never raised her voice at him, not in anger, spite, or fear or pain. He didn't bother responding to her spiked words, carefully watching as this new Yuuki trembled, shook and shimmered in abrupt fiery emotion.

"I'm the one who's always forgiving. For your rash emotions, your spiteful remarks, your apathetic behaviour...that's me. I always bow my head down for your rudeness. So don't you _dare_ tell me I don't know anything about forgiveness. You're the one who's long past due for your chance."

He wasn't speechless, no, he was just shocked. And he didn't need this right now, didn't need this stupid drama, this sort of awkward, painful rift to form between them. He had been just fine with hating her, hating everyone; being quiet and not doing anything about it. He shouldn't have stopped from returning to his post, he shouldn't have listened and stayed because this, this was the mess he didn't want to deal with – wanted nothing to do with.

So he walked away.

He was a coward, that's what she thought and Yuuki had never seen such a thing on someone like Zero. Something so low on someone so admirable – she didn't know him. Didn't know the coward that was walking away and as she hissed the word out, she didn't regret it.

Anger shot through him in a sharp arrow and his movements were quick and murderous as he held her up by her pale throat against the rough stone of the tall building, just a few yards away from where they had stood.

"I am not a coward." he seethed, anger laced, eyes ablaze.

"Then why are you walking away?" Yuuki shot back.

His hand was tight on her throat, not choking her but at the very least sending electrically painful waves through her body.

"There's nothing more to say." and at each word, his grip seemed to tighten.

"There's plenty more to say," her words were short, breathing shallow but voice even.

"I can kill you." he said bluntly, peering at her face as her lips parted for air – her bad habit that kept every young Vampire alive in their first years.

Amidst her struggle, she stared rebelliously back at him. "But you won't."

Too much confidence was in her voice, confidence that he knew was right to be there. He didn't need all Vampires on his back – the result if he killed her.

"Because you need to get away. You want freedom, you want a life that doesn't have anything to do with Vampires or Hunters. Isn't that so," she murmured, eyes far out and before he knew it, one by one, his fingers had unlatched and she had fallen gracefully onto her feet. It wasn't compulsion, he could see, though.

"And you'll keep on running, hunting, killing, until every last one of us...are gone."

"Everyone wants freedom, you Vampires aren't so different in that case. Are you?" he retorted, drained and he looked so much like the Zero she remembered.

Yuuki nodded, one hand fingering the finger indents on her throat, feeling the conclave of where he had almost killed her. And soon, he was going to finish the job, she reminded herself placidly.

Because either side could get the freedom. Without Vampires, Hunter were free; without Hunters, Vampires were free. There was no chance at a co-existence and Yuuki and Zero knew that.

There was a dull sound of motorcycles in the distance, so consistent and rhythmic; they looked at each other, a tugging pull marring their faces.

"Keep on running."

* * *

My first Vampire Knight fic, so, what'd you think?

Thank you for reading and don't forget to give some thoughts and feelings.


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